Skip to main content

Stop the Work/ Life Balancing Act

Stop the Work/ Life Balancing Act

More than three-quarters of professional leadership teams report that they do not have enough balance in their lives; as a result, they struggle at work, home or both. Women are masters at blaming themselves as to why the infamous work-life balancing act remains unachieved, almost unattainable. Why do we try so hard?

Lauran Star flips this well-engrained reasoning on its head. An army woman turned woman empowerer, Star is on a mission to break the ideal of a perfectly balanced life. Heartily honest and thought-provoking, Star addresses women of all corporate fields, and inspires them stop surviving through life, but rather blissfully thriving through it.

She zeroes in on a handful of strategies. The first is to invest time in organizing your time and relationships, both at work and in life. She believes this will inherently make you feel more productive and accomplished. You’ll notice you’ll be more fun to be with and your physical and financial health will improve. Most importantly, however, your relationships will feed themselves off of this more nurturing and happier you.

The biggest mistake is to separate work life from “life life.” Many skillsets that work in the office can also work at home. First and foremost of these is your communication strategies.

Anthropologically, men have always been the hunters. They were the food providers and later the pay-check deliverers; hence they have a transactional mind-wiring. Women, on the other hand, were and are the transformational energies in the household. They raise children, cook meals, and maintain a house.

This difference in mindset translates into the different personalities. It is Star’s view that, at work, women forgo their natural instincts and adapt to the male-infused transactional one, so not to be left out.

But what if we changed the dynamics? What if we let go of our “political corporate suits” and were true to our skillsets and true personalities? This same pattern applies to resilience strategies. Women tend to be stronger for others: our families, our jobs, our friends and so on, neglecting ourselves. Star believes that being present for yourself is the first step, allowing yourself to thrive through life.

It is no surprise that our everyday lives result in an exhausting marathon, moving between people, tasks, and deadlines. We call it multitasking, but realistically, as much as we think we are making it all work, this means we are not present for anyone, especially ourselves.

Star believes that we can learn to be resilient. We just have to challenge ourselves to change, and especially want that change to come into our lives. Our strength can also stem from our support systems.

This leads to what Star calls pie-eating, the final strategy. We need to be the CEOs of our own pies, one that is divided into as many slices as we let it be. The more we work through your needs and wants, both at work and at home, the more we can acknowledge what our pie really looks like, and how we can go about enjoying it and ultimately thriving through life. Star says that we need to grasp the collective picture of what we are dealing with, our whole pie. 


Continue learning with this Ellevate Playbook: